So Friday night was just us girls, as the boys had a baseball tournament (post to follow). It was Staci (pictured above, left), me, and my daughter, Natalie. She will kill me when she finds out I posted the picture below, with her goofy smile and scraggly teeth.
Now when we got to the race Natalie decided to be a major grump because she was going to have to wait for us to finish running, and she had no friends there (so she thought) and she couldn’t even partake in the bounce house because she was too big (so she said). I refused to let her attitude frustrate me, and I told her that she could be grumpy, as long as she stayed nearby so I could find her after the race. (This was a small town race and we knew a lot of the people there so I wasn’t worried with leaving her alone.)
I told her that as soon as the race started they would be setting up a snack table at the finish line for the runners, and that she was welcome to grab a snack while she waited. This perked her up quite a bit. Then, she asked me if she could run with me at the end, and I explained she could watch for me near the finish line, and when she saw me coming up the hill, she could join me in crossing the finish line. Then Staci asked her if she wanted to run the race, because it was probably still early enough to sign her up. And guess what? She said YES, she wanted to run it! I couldn’t believe it! So we rushed over and got her a bib.
My original plan with this race was to shoot for a new PR, but when Natalie decided she was running, I thought for sure she would poop out like she did with the one mile run two years ago. But I was just so thrilled she was running with us that I gave that up. I would walk if she needed to, just so we could stay together.
And then as we were waiting for the countdown, Natalie saw that a friend of hers was running, so they paired up. We counted down, the gun went off, and so did Natalie and her friend! They left us in the dust. I saw her one more time at the turnaround, and then again at the finish. She was smiling the biggest smile, and waving her medal proudly. She was a 5k finisher.
I did beat my original PR, which is exciting, but it paled in comparison to Natalie’s achievement. She turned her attitude around and stepped out of her comfort zone. She didn’t know if she would be able to run the whole way, let alone run it in 34:32! Not bad for a beginner. The best news is that she had such a great time, she says she wants to run another 5k in the future, perhaps with her brother and me! This one proud momma right here.
So I’ve been making some pretty casual prayers for the last couple months about wanting direction from God, where does He want to use me, that kind of thing. But then this past week I made a much more intentional prayer, telling Him I really had a strong desire to be an encouragement to other people and to share with them how I got through such rough times, with God’s help, and how they can too. So I told Him that’s what I was feeling, and asked that He show me where He wants me, where He can use me for His glory. How can I be an encouragement to others when I’m “stuck” here at home most days?
Then I was at my weekly Bible study on Wednesday morning and the leader of the program approached me and asked if I would consider being a group leader next year. What?! I mean, YES! She said I should go home and pray about it, but I explained to her what I had already been praying for, and that this sounded like it was the answer to my prayer. And God is just so cool like that. She and I talked again today, more in depth about what the responsibility entails, and I have to say I’m even more excited. This is going to open up so many more opportunities to build relationships with other women and I get to share my heart, my Jesus, with them.
So that’s going on, and I’m super geeked. Also, I’m still committed to working this ItWorks business even through some bumpy starts. I was replenishing some of my own products and ordering some advertising bling (blender bottle, new purse) and they sent me the wrong stuff and duplicate items and I was tempted to regret the whole decision to be a distributor. BUT, it gave me a chance to interact with their customer service, which was mostly awesome and extremely helpful. And while I’ll never be the gung-ho marketer trying to get you to buy stuff you don’t need, I think this is gonna work. Because I truly love all the products I’ve tried and I’ll be honest and open with anyone who shows interest. So when people come to me with questions – which they have! – I’m happy to point them in my direction. As in – wait for it, here’s my shameless plug – “You can check out my website at stillmindy.itworks.com! Some of my favorites are the Chocolate Greens and the Keto Energy. And I’m a huge fan of the loyal customer program!” – End of shameless plug, moving on…
The other thing I’m excited about is tomorrow I’m running another 5k race! It’s the Mason 5k, and this was my first ever race back in 2016. My son has run it with me every year, but this year he has a baseball tournament so I’m on my own this time. No worries! My friend Staci, who I believe has also run this race every year with me, is joining me again. So fun to run with friends. My 5k PR is 38:34 and I would like to beat that, but given the knee pain I’ve been having, I’m not sure if that’s realistic. I learned the other day that runners over 40 are called “masters athletes”, and that we need longer recovery times, which I haven’t been exactly doing, so I may have screwed my chances by pushing too hard. I’m just going to try and have fun and do my best.
And that, my friends, is your Thursday recap. Hug someone today!
Today I ran/walked almost 8 miles. I had a successful 8 mile run last week but this one didn’t go so well.
The first 4 miles were fine. Around 5 or 6 my left knee started hurting. I’m not sure why it does this, or whether I should get a knee brace or bother seeing the orthopedic surgeon again. When this happens I generally push through the pain until it gets too unbearable, and then I walk for awhile to give it rest. I need to be careful with it so I don’t end up with permanent damage.
Around mile 7 my left leg just completely gave out on me. With no warning, as soon as I put weight on that leg it collapsed. Thankfully, or miraculously, I was able to catch my balance. So I didn’t fall, but I was nervous to keep running. I pretty much walked the rest of the way home, with short bursts of jogging tiny, careful steps every now and then.
The last mile though, was all walking. Walking, and telling myself this was not a failure, because im doing the work. I’m not a slacker, right Bob? This is just part of my training process, and when my body is telling me I’m pushing it too hard, sometimes I need to listen. Today was definitely one of those times. So training is going well, I guess.
I was chatting with one of my infusion nurses yesterday and she told me she wanted to start running, but wasn’t sure how to go about it. I shared with her that I started really slowly, and had great success with the Couch to 5k program. I encouraged her to just start, and keep moving a little farther each time. It’s a slow progression but if you stick with it and keep your eye on your goal, you can do it!
I still really love running and I love that it brings people together who maybe wouldn’t normally have anything in common. It’s been such a great thing and I hope I never have to give it up!
I’ll be honest, I’m not even sure where to start with this post. I had a lot of thoughts running through my head throughout the race and these couple days following.
I’ll start by setting the stage for this 10k race. It was cold and rainy, and by the end, snowy. Michigan weather at its finest. We had been watching the forecast so we knew what we were getting into, and none of us were swayed. We were committed to completing this race, no matter the weather.
I should back up. By “we” I mean myself, a friend from church, and two other friends of hers. So you could say this was kind of out of my comfort zone. I had asked Chris, my church friend, if I could tag along because it was an all female race, and it looked like a lot of fun. It was out of town and they already had plans to stay at a hotel the previous night and they welcomed me with open arms. The comradery among runners is incredible. I’m fairly new to running compared to a lot of others, but throughout this whole experience I was never tempted to feel like an outsider.
The race itself started out pretty smoothly. I was feeling strong and confident for the first few miles. However, about halfway through I was noticing my left foot dragging quite a bit. This “foot drop” is one of the symptoms of my MS. Running doesn’t cause new symptoms, but it can aggravate old nerve damage. I have been training for my half marathon this coming fall, and have done plenty of long runs with almost no foot drop, so the fact that it was happening so soon was disheartening. Maybe I was just being more affected because of the excitement and nerves for the race, I don’t know.
My friend Chris had agreed to run with me for the entire race, to be sure I was safe. She did a fabulous job pointing out all the potholes and manhole covers, and steering me away from other obstacles. Throughout the race I did not trip even one time! However, I would not have finished this race without her assistance.
I think it was around the end of mile 4 I was having serious trouble keeping my foot from dragging. I was also experiencing some side and shoulder pain, but I was afraid to slow down and walk. My balance is better when I’m running. Something about the motion, I guess. I have another friend with MS who says the same thing about running. Walking requires a different movement and different nerves, I suppose. I told Chris what I was experiencing and she urged me to walk to give my body a rest, and use her arm for balance. At this point I was pretty discouraged and frustrated with what was going on with my body. I had not expected this to happen so soon. When Chris explained to me that my pace at the beginning of the race was much faster than I had been training at, it all made sense. I had been training between a 14 and 15 minute mile, but I had been running closer to 12! So clearly I had made a mistake, and I was paying the consequences.
I tell myself I don’t care about times and personal records, but that’s a big fat lie. I do care. I am always competing with myself, and I feel a great sense of pride when I am able to see my pace improve. The problem is, I want it to happen sooner than is realistic. So now thanks to my prideful denial of my physical abilities, I hobbled the last two miles of the race mostly hanging for dear life on Chris’ arm. I felt ashamed, defeated. My ugly pride had taken a hit. I started off too fast and it hurt me in the end. This felt a lot like failure, because I feel like I should have known better.
But listen – this was NOT failure. I finished the race! And with a PR to boot! So I made it more challenging for myself by starting too fast, and I had to lean on a friend to accomplish my goal of finishing. So what? Can we all agree there’s nothing wrong with that? We all have challenges in our lives, and very often we have to lean on our friends for help. Friendships enrich our lives, make us stronger, make us better. This is good!
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 ESV “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.”
There was a point in the race that I was feeling particularly angry. Not angry at myself, but angry at the multiple sclerosis that makes things so difficult. On most days I am able to function like a normal person and can almost forget I have this affliction. But then you run 6.2 miles and you are reminded. And that sucks, Big Time. So yes, I was angry. But then I was reminded that I hated running for most of my life. I didn’t start running until 2015, six years after I was diagnosed with MS. I run because I have MS. To show myself and others that it’s possible. MS doesn’t have to mean life in a wheelchair. This is what I believed when they first diagnosed me, and I know now that’s not the case.
I watched the following day as Worknesh Degefa dominated the Women’s Elite Race in the Boston Marathon. She ran the last 20 miles alone. Way ahead of the pack. Yes, it was cool that she was in the lead, but what was even cooler was that she was doing her thing. It didn’t seem to bother her one bit that she was surrounded by absolutely no one. The mental fortitude that must have taken is something I aspire to. If I can run these races and just zone out Degefa-style, then perhaps I can keep a steady pace and finish strong.
So I learned a few lessons with this race. I learned that you can’t rush the process. You have to pace yourself, and that requires patience and humility. There may be people zooming by you, but pay no attention. As Chris encouraged me I think during mile six – “you do you”. Forget about the other runners. Just keep moving toward the finish line. You’ll get there. Lesson #2: You want to change your pace? Do it in training. Don’t switch that up during a race. Sorry, I don’t know how that applies to life. It might pretty much just be applicable to running 😉 And lesson #3 was that friendships are invaluable gifts and not to be taken lightly.
My dad was able to join us to spectate this race, and it meant a lot to have family there rooting me on. He called me the following day and asked how I was feeling. He specifically asked if I was still planning on running a half marathon and I answered without hesitation – YES. No question. At this point in time I have no idea how I’ll physically manage it, but I’m choosing to trust in the training process. Four years ago I was barely walking, three years ago I ran my first 5k, and just 6 months ago I ran my first 10k. This body just keeps getting stronger. The more I push, little by little, the farther I can go. I don’t know how far MS will let me go with this running stuff, but I’m gonna keep pushing the line until she forces me to stop. And with God’s grace, I have hope that day will never come.
I ran a race today. It was hard. I’m exhausted. But I finished, and I have the medal to prove it. This was a challenging run for many reasons and I plan to post all my thoughts and feelings on it but not today. Today I sleep.
Okay, I’ll be honest, I’ve been fighting a respiratory gunk all this week – spring break week for my kiddos – but I’m managing to not let it keep me down. I’ve been able to really enjoy some memorable times with my family that I think are worth mentioning.
Like the other night, when I chatted through Facebook messenger with my little brother. He was up late, per his usual, and he saw I was up too so he started a conversation. This is my dear brother who is 13 years younger, and yet we have a special sort of bond. He came to be part of our family as a 9 month old baby when I was still in school. I don’t remember how old he was when we adopted him, but it doesn’t matter because he was family long before it was court official.
When I was in high school, he was learning to walk and talk and play and the two of us were best buddies. We lost touch over the years but have recently been able to reconnect and it really is a miracle to me that it feels like no time has passed. We still seem to have that connection. So while it wasn’t anything unusual or extraordinary, chatting online with him, it was a memory I’ll cherish. I’m hoping and praying that there are many more opportunities like that for us down the road.
So that was happy family memory #1. Happy family memory #2 is that my mom came to visit from Oklahoma! She flew all the way out here and split her time between her three children: first my younger sister, then me, then my older brother. She was with us for three days and it was really great to have her here sharing life with us. We went roller skating with the kids. I don’t skate, as a rule because my balance is nonexistent, but she went for one round before she discovered it was a lot harder than she remembered. Skating is hard for us old folks, you know.
We also went on a ridiculously long walk to the Mediterranean restaurant up the road, and enjoyed some delicious chicken shawarma and falafel. (I’m sorry Mom, I honestly thought it was only a mile. I should have known better.) I’m just glad we survived the walk and it was still really nice to have that time to enjoy the sunshine and fresh air.
Oh, and lastly was some bowling. We all pretty much suck at bowling except for my mom so of course she kicked our tails. We also did a lot of lounging around in between activities, and that was nice to have her sort of blend into our rhythms. We never know when we’ll be able to visit again so we like to make the most of the time we do get.
We had such a full week it’s hard to believe it’s only Friday and the weekend is just beginning! My big plan for tomorrow is to go for a long run first thing in the morning (so I don’t spend all day making excuses like I did today) and then I don’t know. Kids are still technically on spring break so maybe we’ll find something fun to do. I kicked my son’s tail in Monopoly today, so maybe tomorrow I’ll give him a rematch. Or not. Monopoly is an exhausting game.
Anyhoo, I hope y’all enjoyed your week and have a fabulous weekend! Love on your family today, will you?
This may end up to just be be a brain dump, what’s on my mind in no particular order. Just a warning.
I’m doing okay with half marathon training. However, on one of my runs last week, Tuesday, I managed to trip on the seam of the sidewalk and went tumbling hands first to the concrete. Luckily I’m short, 5’1″, so it wasn’t much of a fall. I was certain in the excruciatingly painful moment that I had broken my right index and middle fingers. I lay on the ground, whispered a few f bombs, breathed my way out of a crying fit, and stood up slowly. I walked slowly toward home, assessing the damage as I went. I was scraped and bleeding in several spots, but thankfully nothing was broken. My cochlear implants were even in place through it all, thanks to the headband I wear over them when I run. Turns out I just jammed the fingers pretty good and a nurse friend told me it could take up to six weeks to fully heal. She said I can speed up the process by icing it daily, taking Motrin for the swelling and pain, and wrapping it to keep myself from bending the fingers. I’m doing all of these things and the swelling already seems to be better.
I finished a crochet Afghan recently for one of my nephews and I bought yarn for my next project. I’m anxious to start it but I don’t think I’ll be able to until these fingers heal. Such a bummer. Can I use that excuse to get out of folding laundry or washing dishes? No? Fine. You’re no help.
Oh! I’ve discovered a new thing. Well, new to me. Sort of. Podcasts. I know this is not new because I used to listen to several when my children were just babies. Somehow I had time for that then. Well now I hadn’t considered them because I figured they would be too difficult to understand with cochlear implants but I started listening to my weekly Bible study lessons online, while I read along with the pdf version. It turns out I can understand quite well! I need something to listen to as my training runs get longer, and music just wasn’t cutting it because the tempo always screws up my pace. Plus I’ve run out of music I enjoy, and I can’t just keep replaying the same playlist, that’s so boring! So I tried running while listening to the Bible study lesson and it worked great! The time seemed to go by much faster and I was able to keep a steady pace and still focus on my form as well.
So I’ve downloaded a podcast app and subscribed to a few stations, including the Dave Ramsey show, which has always been a favorite. I have to stay sharp for the Financial Peace class I’m leading so that’s more for business than for pleasure (though I’ll admit I do find it entertaining, cuz I’m a nerd).
I have other thoughts and things but it’s way too late for me to be up so that’s all for now. Until next time…
I may be deaf and half-blind, but I am and will always be… still Mindy